❤sadden..but happy memories!!
okay here i am to blog agian..

last night wasn't a very good night for me luckily shawn and alex were there for me..i had trouble sleeping..problem was that i and jason were kinda quarreling..than after all the crap..i wanted to go sleep but i was seriously unable to sleep..so i went down to 7 11 to get some pills which i bought to box..than go home slowly watch tv and swallow them down..ok still not drowsy yet..so i picked up my house phone and talk all night and i mean like from 1.30am all the way to like 6 am..and did not go school today la..during the night i had to ask them to wait..i was practically throwing up everything i ate..including the pills..i just sat on the kitchen table and started to think..that i wish i could just die..but i rmb on saturday night sly was talking to me bout life and he didn't want me to perish but live eternal life..and i was like okay..i'm gonna change..but to think of all my problem i couldn't take the stress anymore..i just wished that life could just pass by me even with a blink of an eye..i really want to MIA and get away from the world..but i know i cant..lex and shawn would proberly find where i would be..and my cg would be so sad..and i want to have a healthy cg..and i promis zu zhang i would not let him down..i'd continue to come srv every sat..

shawn and alex knew bout mum and dad divorcing stuff as usual..practically know everything bout me..the food i eat the number of black clothes i have..OK..everything okay..so they were like "we know it affecting you but dont you think its selfish if you just die like that?? and let us go?? LIKE DANIEL for goodness sake..all we've been through all these 8 yrs..don't you think these friendship we moulded would be a waste?? yes we fought, yes we quarreled but still most of our time are happy times and that we are in this with you for good and bad.." and it really touched me so much..i was crying on the phone and its the first time shawn talk to me in these manner..and i was like kinda awake..and i said i could never forget such friends la..but alex and shawn are not just my friends they are family to me and i love them the way they are..i would just let life go in a blink of an eye like them without them..and Daniel too..but sadly he's MIA..i dunno where on earth is he..but i guess writing this i hope Dan you'll come back fast okay??
we miss you uberly alot..miss you stupid stunts and jokes and you little cute laughter..

really those with me in my life like:
alex, shawn, daniel, ben, benson,benedict,gavin, carol, the triplets and my shan yan..i would never have today the ME..

and AN QI jie..for all the support she gave me..even though she has a child to look after..and her work and stuff even for a single mom to bother bout me..she really cared for me alot..thank you sexy mum!!

just want to thank E361 too!! giving me all the love i never had at home..and LINETTE TOO!!
for all the lunches and dinners and restaurant she brought me too and treating me..and my CGL CHENG JUN for all the counselling and the mos burgers he bought for me..THANK YOU ALL!!

and obviously the one i cant forget at all..FOUR BUDDIES!! my NIKKI,DIANA AND RACHAEL ..me too la..but they were there for me all these years in my secondary school life..like even though i and diana used to cant get along very well but actually we had alot of things in common.. and its the four buddies secret!! hahas..adn for nikki..always there for me..never forsakes me..knowing me like an elder sister..and rachael the gila woman..who was with me since day one of sec school life..thank you girls!! i love you all too much!!

as much as those in 4/1 i love you'll too!! alot okay..we are graduating like this 16 november..im really gonna miss those funny quarrels, tears and laughters together in class..driving teachers outta the class..making fun of them..cheating in EOA class.with mr philip..all the littlest things guys!! all the pizzas and stuff..my god we could really eat alot man!!! hahas..