❤
im tired and sick of life..
why cant someone just throw a
whole luggage of 13,000 dollars at me!!
i cant be bothered and just take it to pay up
my fucking school fee and need not let my dad
be stressed up..damn it man..

today is the first time i see my dad
so stress and cried in chec...
thanks to me and my stupid life..
if not dad doesnt have so much burden,
i know no one is perfect byut i cant help
seeing my dad so sad.. and he is even sacrificing
is life for my education for a big U turn in life..
even though he knows his days are numbered..
i really am beginning to hate myself so much,
if not all this wouldnt have happen..should have stuck with
NT plan just go straight into ITE get a damn cert..


now decided to take one yr off..the school fee is giving my dad too much
stress and i cant take it seeing him this way..im really tired..because of this divorce
thing at home i'm tired too..i dont want to go on..i may smile and i may play around
but i think that stronghold i used to put up, i cant do it anymore..the stress im
growing through now, i dont know how long more i can take it..i hate life now!!!

i dont feel like living right now..i want to stop the tears..but i cant...it just keep rolling
i see dad going through this stress for me i feel more stress...and i just want to die,

edwin came today and stayed with me for 2 hour at home watching me cry..
im glad he is still here for me even if its over 2 yrs things between us...
this is the one of the most saddest state im am in and its an open wound for everyone
and anyone to see it..and i just wish God would make and open door for me or take me
home..i cant take the stress..the hurt is worst than stabbing me!! i want to walk on the
road and be run over by a car..and be back in Big Daddy God's arm..i give up, i really
give up..i cant move on..my feet is too tired and i'm weak in my emotions..i want to give
up so badly..i want to go back HOME!!